Confidence

Today I was talking to my son about confidence.

I was telling him how important it is to not allow your decisions to be overly influenced by dickheads who take any of your accomplishments as if they were direct insults regarding their own incompetence, or lack of action. I was telling him it’s important to listen to your critics because sometimes that criticism can be constructive, but always separate it from those who are simply contrary regarding whatever activity you are part of.

Then I mentioned to him how it can often appear that I am very self-confident. He looked at me with a quizzical look on his face because, as he told me, he sees me as very confident. And I told him it’s not that I’m super confident in myself it’s just that I frequently forget to not be confident. More often than not my enthusiasm, excitement, or my imagination completely overwhelms my lack of confidence, and I completely forgot that I have no idea what I’m talking about. I don’t think anybody really knows what they’re talking about most of the time, and do think most people are in a constant state of improvisation, making things up as they go along based on a few talents, insights, and past experiences they can draw on.

Just like regular improv, only the audience doesn’t know it’s improv.

I try to remind myself that I’m in the same improvisational boat, but my enthusiasm, determination, or my excitement in problem-solving can make it appear to others that I am overconfident, but that’s not the case. I just get worked up, and forget to be underconfident.